Ghost Busting

I want to reach out to you
I feel like I need to say something
But what I don’t want to do
Is mess it up and say the wrong thing
I can’t afford to put myself out there again
Can’t take the chance of being just your friend
It’s a lose-lose situation
No way I can win.
If I give in and you’re not ready
Then it will only hurt me
So I sit here and say nothing
That’s not who I’m supposed to be
I’m not cold and heartless
I really do still care
You’re the one who moved on
And left me standing there
What if this was you trying
To get back to being just friends?
Trying to get back to “normal” again
I’m not ready to try,
I’m still not over you
And how you told me goodbye
And how Forever turned into Never
And all the tears I cried
I want to reach out to you
And ask you how you’re doing
Ask about your family
But doing will only
Show you’re moving on without me
I don’t want to know that you’re fine
I don’t want to see that you’re okay
I want to know how you sleep at night
I want to know if you miss me
But why don’t you reach out
Why doing you check in on me
When my life was falling apart
Why weren’t you here for me?
Wrestling with these thoughts and feelings
Wrestling with my fears
How can I take that next step
When my support has disappeared
Can I do this by myself
Can I do this on my own
And if I do this at all
How do I do life all alone?
I want to reach out to you
I want to reply so bad
But I know that if I do
It will only make me sad
Because there’s no more You & I
There’s no more Beauty & the Beast
No more Albert & Allegra
There’s no more you and me
You used to ease my pain
You used to calm my storms
I can’t put myself out there again
Knowing that you moved on
So I’ll sit here in silence
Messages left on Read
No reply can I provide you
What I want to say left unsaid
I still love you, I still miss you
I remember back to those days
When they weren’t just words
That just faded away
You were my flame
You were my twin
You were my one and only
But you needed time
You needed space
You needed to move on without me
I didn’t need time
I didn’t need space
I had already found myself
I needed you in my life again
I don’t want anyone else
You were my hope, you were my dreams
Every time I closed my eyes
But now when I think of you
It makes me want to cry…

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